In fact, Sandy almost got famous. Click here to see pictures from the conference. If you go to the 3rd to the last picture, you can see Randy Alcorn to the left and some nice family talking with him at the table. But if you look very closely at the right side of the picture, you can see half of someone...no, not me - Sandy!
We had a great time, and I'll blog more about the fun stuff later. But I had a bit of an A-ha! spiritual moment. God was so good and kind to bless me with some spiritual illumination. On the first day of the conference, I listened to Tullian Tchividjian, pastor of Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church. He was speaking about Gospel math - Jesus + nothing = everything.He talked about how Gospel math addresses the issue of identity. Our identity is in Christ so we don't need any person's approval or affection because God already approves and loves us through Christ. Because of the Gospel, I have nothing to prove or to protect. I can lose my reputation, my prestige, and/or my standing in human eyes because I already am established before God. My identity is secure in Christ, and I don't have to worry about losing anything because I already have everything I could ever need or want.
I've definitely known that my identity is in Christ for many years. But I didn't realize that I hadn't truly understood the implications of that. I have been searching for many, many years for the affection and approval of others. I have been searching to belong to a group, to be accepted by others. Tullian said that living your life trying to gain favor or acceptance = slavery.
God opened my eyes this weekend to realize that I have been trying to do that. I have been trying more hardest and best to please people. To gain others' acceptance and approval for my ministry. And doing this, has been killing my soul. I have been trying to be something I can't. I've been trying to be someone I'm not.
That was another theme in this conference. Many of the pastors who spoke exhorted us to be ourselves as pastors. Don't try and be John Piper. Don't try and be someone you're not. Use the gifts and personality that God has given you to do the best you can in Christ, but be yourself.
What freedom this brings! God has already approved and accepted me as I am so that I can serve Him in love. I can be the pastor He has gifted me to be. And by His grace, I can turn from the idol of seeking others' praise and acceptance. Because of the Gospel, I can receive criticism and disapproval of others because I am secure in Christ.
Jesus + nothing = EVERYTHING...amen!
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